Myth # 2: We "fell out of love" and probably need a divorce (or a break up, or something)!
How Marriage Counseling Raleigh NC And Marriage Counseling Wake Forest NC Can Strengthen Your Relationships (With Yourself AND Your Loved Ones)
As a marriage counselor in Raleigh, North Carolina, I work with couples and individuals to help them feel more connected, secure, and loved.
Marriage counseling Raleigh NC provides a secure environment for couples who don't know how to express love anymore without fighting to work on exploring their emotions and rekindling their connection.
Couples counseling can help you get to a place in your relationship where you love and feel loved again
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Relationship Myth # 1: Fighting a lot means we are in trouble
Relationship Myth # 3: Relationships should feel easy and natural Relationship Myth # 4: Couples therapy provides amazing results in a short period of time
Summer is finally here, guys! Which means that the season for all kinds of fun local activities here in Raleigh has officially begun. My husband and I had an opportunity to check out the Midtown Beach Music Festival yesterday. If you are unfamiliar with it, it’s an 18-week series festival that takes place every Thursday from 6-9pm inside the North Hills Mall in Raleigh (which happens to be just minutes from where we live, yay) between the months of April and August each year. It was hot, crowded, and a bit loud, but also super fun. They have all kinds of street foods and drinks, so some people bring chairs to sit and people watch while other dance away (depending on how much heat your body can regulate)! We didn’t dance because it was over 90 degrees out, but we did have ice cream and really enjoyed the beach music. Oh, and watching people, especially those dancing couples. Most of them looked so sweaty and happy, not caring about anything in the world in that moment. I became curious whether they were married couples or just those new, dating couples whose energy is usually very different.
We were standing too far away for me to see if they had rings on their fingers. Does something similar ever happen to you-you see a happy couple in public and wonder how long they’ve been together. Do they still feel “in love”? And if so, who is their marriage counselor since they are doing so well after all these years?:)
Jokes aside, though, the topic for today’s blog post is one of the most common relationship myths that I see with my couples in my office in Wake Forest. And I don’t think that such myth is local only by all means because I saw it over and over again when I used to practice in Northern VA and even across the country in Southern California. Honestly, I was actually one of those couples myself who used to believe that “love is everything” and if we are not feeling “it” anymore, we should divorce. Which we actually ended up doing with my first husband, but there was much more to that decision, of course.
Truth it, we all want it-raw, passionate, unconditional love and acceptance when it comes to our romantic relationships. A person who just “gets” us without having to explain anything. A relationship where we feel safe. A marriage where we feel like we “belong.” Not just co-exist like good roommates, taking care of kids and projects, and anything else, except the marriage.
Is it too much to ask?
NO, absolutely not.
However, you first have to understand how love and relationships work. Which is different than what you may normally see on TV and movies. Very different. Let me explain. According to Dr. Scott Peck, a psychiatrist, and bestselling author, “falling in love is a trick pull on our otherwise conscious mind to hoodwink or trap us into marriage. Frequently the trick goes away one way or another because the experience of falling in love is invariably temporary. No matter whom we fall in love with, we sooner or later fall out of love if the relationship continues long enough. This is not to say that we invariably cease loving the person with whom we fell in love. But it is to say that the feeling of ecstatic lovingness that characterizes the experience of falling in love always passes. The honeymoon always ends. The bloom of romance always fades, and that is the time when real love begins.”
Do you follow, my friend? That raw, crazy, passionate love that you are talking about ALWAYS goes away after a certain period of time. AND this is completely normal! In fact, you don’t have to do anything about it and it does NOT mean that the relationship is over and that you might need a divorce. It means that the real relationship is just starting, and you have to start working at it more (now that the “unconditional” everything is fading away). And what you might need instead of getting a divorce is a good couples therapist who can teach you how to have healthy, passionate, and connected relationships.
Remember, that most people do not know how to have healthy relationships because no one taught them this. We are assumed to just learn as we go about how to be vulnerable with our romantic partners and how to communicate our needs. As a result, we just suck at it and don’t even know it. But you don’t have to struggle any longer because I can help. I am an expert in helping couples reconnect and find that deep love for one another.
I can teach you how to live in the day to day in a way that leaves you feeling connected and energized about being with your partner.
I can help you move from feeling “ok” about your relationship to feeling “I can’t believe this shit is real” kinda relationship!
If you need more help than this blog can give you or want to schedule your free 15-minute phone consultation with me, click here. I offer the best marriage counseling I can! You can also check out the FAQs to learn more.
This is not your typical weekly kind of therapy. I am here to help couples and individuals in relationships do what is proven to work to help them heal their relationships. Through marriage counseling Raleigh NC, marriage retreat in North Carolina, online therapy North Carolina, and individual counseling, there is something for every couple who wants to heal their relationship.
Stop wasting years of your precious life trying to feel happy. Schedule your free 15-minute consultation with me today by clicking here. During the call, you will discover how having a place to heal your relationship with a guide can take you from the hurt to a healthier relationship than the one you grew up with.