Marriage Counseling Wake Forest NC

You Are Tired of a Stale, Roomate Like Marriage

Now that the kids are a little older and you have a minute to breathe and think, you realize just how much you are tired of your stale, sexless marriage. And it’s not that you don’t love your partner anymore because you do- VERY, VERY much. And you also adore the beautiful family you have built together.  But your marriage is just not what you thought it would be 5, 8, or 12 years later.

You long for communication that goes beyond the everyday logistics—who’s picking up the kids, what’s for dinner, whose turn it is to clean the kitchen. You want to feel truly seen and alive again. You want to laugh together, have fun, and feel like you’re on the same page, beyond all the transactional bullshit. Sure, the raw passion of early love changes in long-term relationships, but sometimes you find yourself wondering: Is this really it?

At the end of the day, after work, bedtime routines and endless chores, the last thing you want is to force another conversation. But divorce isn’t what you want either. You’re too young, and honestly, too smart, to settle for a roommate-like marriage when you know deep down that your relationship has the potential to offer so much more.

Sometimes, with a glass of wine and a rare night away from the kids, you catch a glimpse of what your marriage could feel like again. You can almost touch it. But then routine creeps back in, the kids start fighting over something ridiculous, and you’re left feeling exhausted, alone, and angry.

Why Traditional Weekly Counseling Isn’t Enough

You’ve tried therapy before, both individual and marriage counseling, and you believe in it. It’s helped in some ways. But this time, you’re longing for something deeper and more sustainable. Not just basic communication skills. Not just tools for surviving.

You want an approach that helps you thrive. Something designed for couples who already know who they are, what they want, and who are doing well in so many areas of life, except in their marriage.

That’s why I no longer offer traditional weekly counseling. Weekly 50-minute sessions often mean you spend the first 10 minutes catching up, then we spend at least 10 minutes wrapping things up, only to scratch the surface before time runs out. Then, just when you’re starting to go deeper, the clock pulls you out, and the cycle repeats the next week. Real breakthroughs are hard to come by in that stop-and-start rhythm.

Intensive work in a form of a day long retreat is different. In a six-hour day, we don’t have to rush. We can stay with the hard stuff long enough to finally understand what’s happening between you and create a new experience of connection right there in the room. One intensive often equals months of progress in weekly therapy because instead of circling the same arguments, you walk away with clarity, relief, and a renewed sense of possibility in your marriage.

How the Intensive Format Works

Think of an intensive as pressing “pause” on the noise of everyday life so you can finally give your relationship the time and focus it deserves. Instead of spending months in stop-and-start weekly sessions, you dedicate two full days to slowing down, going deep, and staying with the heart of the issues until something shifts. For some couples, this may also include Ketamine-Assisted Psychotherapy (KAP) as part of the process, which can open the door to even deeper healing and connection.

Here’s what it looks like:

We Start With a Clear Plan: On Day 1, we’ll gather your history, goals, and what feels most urgent. This allows us to be intentional with our time and dive right into what matters most.

Twelve Hours of Deep, Focused Work: In weekly therapy, you may only get about 20–25 minutes of true “working time” before the session ends. During your initial intensive retreat, you get twelve uninterrupted hours (with breaks, of course). That’s the equivalent of 5 months of therapy in two days. We’ll move past surface-level conversations and actually create new experiences of safety and connection right there in the room.

Space to Process and Integrate: We’ll take time for lunch and short breaks so you can breathe, reflect, and let things land. Many couples say these pauses actually help them see each other differently and return ready for deeper work. For those who choose to include KAP, this integration time is especially powerful.

Walking Away With Real Change: By the end of Day 2, and sometimes even Day 1, couples often feel relief, clarity, and a renewed sense of possibility. You leave not only with insights, but also with a lived experience of relating differently, something you can carry into your everyday life right away. You will have a chance to schedule your next retreats and, if desired and appropriate, each of you will complete a medical evaluation with my collaborating prescriber to do Ketamine Therapy. I encourage couples to commit to at least 5 intensives to create real traction. Most couples need about 12 intensives across a year to fully stabilize new patterns and prevent backsliding. While 12 months may sound like a long time, it’s a huge upgrade compared to the 2–3 years traditional weekly therapy often requires, or the decades some couples spend in counseling that never addresses the root problems.

What Makes Irina’s Work So Effective?

Couples often tell me they can feel right away that this work is different, and it shows in the heartfelt reviews I’m grateful to receive year after year. The truth is, I don’t just “teach communication skills” or hand out quick fixes. I use powerful, research-backed methods that help couples create real, lasting change.

At the core of my work is Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)—the gold standard in couples counseling and the only approach recommended by the American Psychological Association. EFT helps partners move beyond surface-level conflict and finally understand the deeper patterns that keep them feeling stuck, disconnected, or unloved.

For some couples, I also integrate Ketamine-Assisted Psychotherapy (KAP). Ketamine opens the brain to new possibilities, softens defenses, and allows couples to access emotions and experiences that traditional talk therapy can’t always reach. When combined with EFT, the results can feel almost magical—deep breakthroughs, a sense of safety you haven’t felt in years, and a new way of being with each other that changes everything.

I’m also deeply committed to my own growth as a therapist. I’m always traveling for advanced trainings, learning from the best in the field, and expanding my toolbox so I can bring the most effective, cutting-edge modalities to my clients. Soon, I’ll be offering Brainspotting—a powerful therapy for trauma and emotional healing that works directly with the brain and body.

What makes my work effective is that I’m fully human in the room with you. I don’t hide behind clinical jargon or pretend to be detached. I feel with you. Sometimes I cry with you. I carry your story in my heart. I care deeply about what happens between you and your partner.

I’ll also tell you the truth, even when it’s hard to hear. I don’t sugarcoat or dance around the real issues. I may drop a swear word here and there because, let’s be honest, marriage can be messy and painful. And I’ll hold you accountable, because change doesn’t happen without both partners showing up and doing the work.

Couples tell me this mix of honesty, heart, and no-BS support is what makes the difference. They know I’m walking right beside them, not above them, not around them, but with them.